Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Join Us


I recently stumbled upon a documentary by Ondi Timoner called Join Us. It follows four families as they leave an abusive church in South Carolina.
Sound familiar?
A link to the film's website is above.

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

No. Seriously. You Can Stop "Leading" Now.

by Brant Hansen


If I had some free time, I might start a 12-step group. For preachers.

Some of these guys can't quit.


Take Ted Haggard, for sad instance. He's fixin' to "lead" again, starting another church, after he said he wouldn't, and so forth. Thing is, before you write him off as exceptionally strange, please know: He's not. Growing up in the church as a preacher's kid, working as a youth pastor, working with hundreds of churches in different ways, I can tell you: There are a LOT of guys like this.

They're talented, smart, know the Bible thoroughly, usually funny, charming, and they really, really need attention. Bad. And the pulpit is the vehicle for it.

Before you say, "Hey, there are a lot of great guys serving churches who aren't like this, and -- " I know. You're absolutely right. And those guys -- the good ones -- are concerned about this, too. They'll have my back on this. They'll acknowledge that for many of their brethren, attention is like sweet nectar. For the addict, seeing a crowd gather is no different than a chain-smoker eyeing a fresh cigarette and a lighter. They've just gotta use it.

The good guys will tell you this, because they know how genuinely hard it is to serve people -- actual, individual people -- compared to being a charming speaker.

It's a cliche, sure, but it really is time for some guys, guys addicted to "leading" "their" church, to do something heretofore unthinkable:

Get a job.

Seriously. A job. Out there, in the big world. Here's the snag, though: Whatever job they get, for them, it'll be a demotion. They won't step into other positions where they get the attention of hundreds of people each week -- including lots of women -- and they won't step into a CEO position, similar to what they've enjoyed for years. Think about it: How many jobs can a guy walk out of grad school, and "take the helm" of an organization of dozens or hundreds of people?

Most schoolteachers will tell you: Being a teacher is either the hardest job in the world, if you care about each kid, or the easiest, if you don't. Same thing with paid pastor-hood. Care about individual sheep, about actually shepherding (pastoring), and it's really, really hard. Heartbreaking, often thankless, and devoid of glamor.

You servant-leaders? You are worth their weight in gold. Thank you for pastoring. Great is your reward.


Doing "great things", in front of a crowd, has its own reward. Have an honest conversation with any man who regularly speaks publicly, cut through the baloney, and you'll hear this: Yes, it DOES play with a man's head a bit to have people regard him as an authority. Yes, there IS some charge to having women, including other men's wives, see you each week and think, "Ah, what a wonderful man."

You're on a stage, after all. And God never told us to do this, this way, by the way. We did that.

(Preaching, in the New Testament, is almost an entirely out-in-public phenomenon. Apostles preached in public squares, outside and in Jewish synagogues -- wherever they could proclaim the Good News to the lost.) We're the ones who made this system, this one-leader-guy-speaks-to-the-same-crowd-every-week system. So be it. Doesn't make it evil, of course. But we're the ones, in many cases, who are enabling addicts.

And this particular addiction has an even darker side: It's often justified with the use, and misuse, of scripture. Jesus says you have only one Master, and we are all brothers, all equals. (Matthew 23) An attention-needing pastor will say, without saying it, perhaps, that Jesus didn't really mean that. Jesus really meant you need talented pulpit speakers.

We all -- singers, speakers, teachers, radio hosts (!), and anyone, actually -- can be addicted to attention. We all can become addicted to the idea that people, and God, need us to be the authority, to lead the little people. Most, thankfully, can't attempt to justify their fix with the Bible.


A sad secret is that many men, many good men, would quit their paid church positions if they thought they *could* get another job. But, at 17, they decided to get a degree in Bible or ministry, and now they feel trapped. They'd love to breathe free. They'd love to serve the Lord as volunteers, to experience the rush of body-life as "just another member" of the body, and their wives would like the break, too.

They don't need the adoration. But this is their career. They honestly suspect they can't get another job. I'm not guessing about this. I've talked to many of them. I feel for them. For awhile, I was them.

And then there are those who just can't quit. They're addicted. Or they have this. Doesn't matter what they've done, whom they've used, or how muddled their own spiritual lives have become with personal ambition -- they've simply got to have attention and authority. They can't just be one of us. They want to be called "Teacher". They love the recognition. And boy, they can sure snow a congregation... but they can't put one over on God.

And God loves them, desperately, which may be why he asked us -- the church -- to help with this problem. Don't call anyone "Teacher" except Jesus, alone, Jesus said.

There are men who love to be seen as the authority, Jesus warned. Don't listen to them, He said. You have but one Teacher, He said. Don't act like those guys are big shots. Don't do it. Don't do it to the Sunday morning speaker, don't do it to radio hosts. Don't do it to anyone, Jesus says. Jesus is our Master. We are all brothers. No part of the body is more important than any other. Ever. Even if someone's on a stage.

Don't do it. It's not good for you, and it's horrible for him. We're not to enable this.

Brilliant, isn't it? But isn't Jesus, always? Amazing how the Lord can use US -- to help addicts.

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

How to Judge "Year Prophecies" Part One

January 1: NewYear’s Day! And with a New Year comes a new rash of “ Year Prophecies.” During the 10 years that my family and I were in the Word of Faith movement, such prophecies became common at the beginning of each year. They ran the gamut from brief messages (anyone remember “1996: The Year of the Fix”?) to some that were several paragraphs long. So how does one know that a prophecy given about the New Year is really from God? Here are a few tips to see if your Man of God’s prophetic word passes muster.

1. It is delivered at the start of the year
If someone gives a year prophecy in July, proceed with caution. That is not a year prophecy; it’s a half-year prophecy. However, giving a year prophecy at the Jewish New Year is okay.

2. Rhyme Scheme
A prophecy becomes all the catchier and memorable if it rhymes. Then the Praise and Worship team can set it to music (see article Play That Funky Music )http://theautonomyofthebeliever.blogspot.com/2009/03/play-that-funky-music.html

3. No Rhyme
There is nothing written anywhere that says a Year Prophecy must rhyme. Don’t limit God by your unbelief or your iambic pentameter. The longer the prophecy, the harder it is to rhyme, although I have seen it done.

4. Has Grammatical Errors Consistent with the Way Your Man of God Speaks
If your prophet or pastor says for example, “dispazootions” instead of “dispensations”, “tooken” instead of “taken” or has a strong Midwestern or Southern accent, the prophecy will sound like that. It’s just God's way of letting you know that every time this man speaks, it’s God speaking through him.

5. Lack of Specifics
Remember that book that gave 88 reasons Christ would return in 1988? If you do, then you realize that a Year Prophecy isn’t going to set any dates or name names or give too much specific information. It only needs to bear witness with your spirit. It’s not going to be really negative either, you can read Jeremiah if you need a rebuke. It will be something to the effect of “God has a blessing for you, and it might get tough for some of you this year but hang in there and we will all be blessed before it’s over with.”

Monday, November 16, 2009

They Think They Are Inviting Me To Church But In Reality, They Are Begging Me To Stay Home

It seems that-try as they might-to get me to go to their church, some people are continually giving me reason upon reason to never darken the door of a church again. The following is a short-list of just what I'm experiencing:

1)Invite me to church telling me how wonderful certain people in the church are, who in fact I know personally to be some of the most untrustworthy people in the community.

2)Walk into Booksamillion only to be so unfortunate as to over hear one dear fellow telling another, "...Honestly, we have probably the best worship band in the country..."

3)Post "live action" photos of the praise and worship band on social networking sites.

4)Rave to people, telling them they are "awesome" just because they get up on stage to sing. (I mean really, if the praise & worship team sat in the back of the sanctuary where no one could see them, would the same people volunteer? Come on!)

5)My former fellow church members describing their new church in EXACTLY the same overly complimentary way they described our cult when we there.

6)Fellow Christians HIGHLY ESTEEMING things of little or no value at all, and at the same time, seeming totally callous to things that are of most importance.

7)Some of my former fellow church members assuming the very same roles they had in our word of faith church.(They see themselves as being to the local church what the Medici were to Florentine art.)

8)Former church family forgetting my name when they invite me to church(because they never knew it in the 10 yrs. we were there).

9)People placing such priority on the local church itself, they aren't able to actually HELP anybody. For example, "I heard that your car broke down on the side of the road on your way to church. I would've stopped to pick you up, but I had to be at the church early to entertain all the people's kids who were working in the morning service." Or, "I'm sorry to hear about the family crisis you had. I would've called, but I was just so busy getting ready for the women's conference...It was awesome, by the way!"

These are just a few, but I'm sure I could add to the list in the future...


Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Isaiah 1:13-17 (The Message)

"Quit your worship charades. I can't stand your trivial religious games: Monthly conferences, weekly Sabbaths, special meetings— meetings, meetings, meetings—I can't stand one more!

Meetings for this, meetings for that. I hate them! You've worn me out! I'm sick of your religion, religion, religion, while you go right on sinning.

When you put on your next prayer-performance, I'll be looking the other way. No matter how long or loud or often you pray, I'll not be listening. And do you know why? Because you've been tearing people to pieces, and your hands are bloody. Go home and wash up. Clean up your act. Sweep your lives clean of your evildoings so I don't have to look at them any longer. Say no to wrong. Learn to do good. Work for justice. Help the down-and-out. Stand up for the homeless. Go to bat for the defenseless. "

Sunday, November 1, 2009

Provender: Are you covering for a spiritually abusive pastor?

Our friends at the blog What Really Matters had a link to this article recently and I wanted to post it here too.

Although we were not inner circle people with our pastor, we did a pretty good job carrying the water for him from a distance!

Provender: Are you covering for a spiritually abusive pastor?